like fags eat ice-cream..

like fags eat ice-cream..

Jon: Are you still available?  My coworker is italian and likes guys..

Me: I’ll die “available”

Jon: I’ll see if he’s on Facebook or Connexion or what other sites you troll.

Me: I DON’T TROLL…i window shop, like a lady

Shitbags on House Hunters Alert: Yuppie scum Seattle couple crate their dog WHILE THEY’RE HOME.

The "Best of" of my trip home.

Best Bumper Sticker: Ditch the bitch, let’s go muddin’!
Runner-up: Keep Honking, I’m Reloading

Best Song: If teardrops were Pennies, I’d be rich - by Dolly Parton
Runner-up: Powerlines and Broken Dreams - fake song that I sang drunk in the backseat of my parents car while they drove me 40 miles to a T.G.I. Fridays for chicken wings.

Best one-liner: Disappointment Gray - The color that my step mom said her new car will be - my dad’s making her buy american :(

Best Joke from my father: What’s Trucker talk for a huge asshole?:  (answer: semi-colon, he farted while giving the answer)

Goodbye Pennsylvania

Goodbye Pennsylvania

My father’s car and our neighbor’s car at the Amish food pantry…needless to say our family scares the shit out of the locals.

My father’s car and our neighbor’s car at the Amish food pantry…needless to say our family scares the shit out of the locals.

Drying out in Amish country with the folks.

Drying out in Amish country with the folks.

my pride and joy

my pride and joy