White Leather Palace

justsayjolie: I opened my front door this morning and found a...

Fri, 17 May 2013 12:20:43 -0400

I opened my front door this morning and found a September Wine & Spirits bag hanging on the doorknob, with a note scrawled across it that read, “Over the years… Matt”

Inside were lighters. The lighters that the hoarder down the hall has been stealing from me for the past four years. You know? I deliberately buy the world’s most hideous lighters just so people can’t steal them from me, except that (1) this and (2) last week I picked up a lighter at Andrew’s house and was like, “Oh hey, there’s my Fenway lighter!”

I will definitely miss living across the hall from Jolie & robbing her blind. When I leave in the morning to go to work, I usually hear her dustbuster or her Kitchen Aid going. She’s getting married & I’m moving to Williamsburg. I guess things eventually have to change but these last four years have been wonderful. She helped me through grad school & my father’s death. You never truly appreciate what you have until you lose it.

I’m bringing back Stuffed Peppers…next the Fiero

Tue, 14 May 2013 20:04:33 -0400

I’m bringing back Stuffed Peppers…next the Fiero

I found my first cellphone!!

Fri, 10 May 2013 18:16:04 -0400

I found my first cellphone!!

I’m moving at the end of this month and I’m too cheap to buy boxes so I’ve been...

Fri, 10 May 2013 17:09:13 -0400

I’m moving at the end of this month and I’m too cheap to buy boxes so I’ve been stealing them from work (our copy paper is now neatly stacked on the coat closet floor.) Yesterday on the subway, a woman offered up her seat because she thought I got laid-off.

bought a $3 blazer off a street fence because it never made it...

Sun, 05 May 2013 18:27:32 -0400

bought a $3 blazer off a street fence because it never made it to 70

Me & Kiki on the WillyB - makin’ it rain (i’m...

Sat, 04 May 2013 13:27:24 -0400

Me & Kiki on the WillyB - makin’ it rain (i’m not pregnant, just fat again.)

Dear old people: Please retire. You’re like 74 and still “working”. You’re...

Thu, 02 May 2013 15:11:08 -0400

Dear old people:

Please retire. You’re like 74 and still “working”. You’re only slowing things down and young people need jobs.

Please, just stop.

Matt

ohhleary: (Previously.) this is brilliant

Tue, 30 Apr 2013 15:19:14 -0400

ohhleary:

(Previously.)

this is brilliant

Obligatory Bloody Mary post: Gratifi Kitchen & Bar in...

Sun, 28 Apr 2013 11:33:01 -0400

Obligatory Bloody Mary post: Gratifi Kitchen & Bar in Houston (Montrose)

I absolutely love the homes in Houston!

Fri, 26 Apr 2013 18:37:00 -0400

I absolutely love the homes in Houston!

God Bless Texas

Fri, 26 Apr 2013 18:34:10 -0400

God Bless Texas

Happy Friday: Tuna tartare tacos & Pinot Grigio

Fri, 26 Apr 2013 17:54:00 -0400

Happy Friday: Tuna tartare tacos & Pinot Grigio

Finally seeing Book of Mormon - Kiki got us 3rd row tickets!

Fri, 19 Apr 2013 20:06:34 -0400

Finally seeing Book of Mormon - Kiki got us 3rd row tickets!

Rendit would be so proud of me: Just corrected a pushy 60-something year old ”business...

Mon, 15 Apr 2013 14:12:12 -0400

Rendit would be so proud of me: Just corrected a pushy 60-something year old ”business man” at Cafe Europe for leaning & pointing over the glass partition at the Create-your-own salad bar station. I held my breath for as long as I could but when he pushed me into the guy in front of me so he could point (and breathe) over to the bean sprouts, I lost it. I think my exact words were “what the fuck are you doing? they understand English, stop breathing all over the food - that’s what the glass is for.”

I feel 100% better about my role in life.

I’m kind of hoping she’s homeless and this coat was...

Sat, 13 Apr 2013 13:56:40 -0400

I’m kind of hoping she’s homeless and this coat was not deliberate

Typical Friday night for a 34 y/o gay man in Manhattan:...

Fri, 12 Apr 2013 20:09:00 -0400

Typical Friday night for a 34 y/o gay man in Manhattan: polishing his All-Clad

It’s almost warm enough for my perennial Tab addiction to once...

Tue, 09 Apr 2013 15:23:49 -0400

It’s almost warm enough for my perennial Tab addiction to once again bloom.

god sometimes this job is like herding retards, but without the satsifaction of helping people with...

Tue, 09 Apr 2013 11:56:17 -0400

god sometimes this job is like herding retards, but without the satsifaction of helping people with actual special needs.

well that’s a lovely name for a print shop

Tue, 02 Apr 2013 18:01:19 -0400

well that’s a lovely name for a print shop

Dolly’s real hair!!!

Sun, 31 Mar 2013 17:50:20 -0400

Dolly’s real hair!!!